Tiger Lilies

Finished this up late last night. 

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Gallery

I’ve created a page for a little gallery showcasing my miniature pointillism drawings and linocut carvings. I’ll continually update it with new works as I finish them so more art will be added in the future. I figured it would probably be nice to have a spot where people can go to see most of my artwork without having to scroll through posts. So have a look see in my Gallery. 😊

When Your Work Is Sacred

“Quiet Agony” – 2013

I had an interesting experience just recently with a buyer, who by word of mouth had gotten wind of my work and decided to contact me in order to purchase some pieces. 

There I was, nervously excited as she listed the works she was interested in buying, when she said to me “…and that piece in the title on your website, I would like that too.”
All of my excitement came to a screeching halt. 

Me: “Uh, you mean the drawing in my logo?”

Her: “Is that what it is?”

Me: “Yes. My logo.”

Her: “Uh yeah, I would like to buy that too.”

A tinge of defensiveness begun to well up inside. At that very moment it felt as if someone was trying to reach into my soul and take something from me. 

Me: “It’s not for sale.”

Her: “Oh, it’s not?”

Me: “No, it’s my logo.”

Her: “Oh.” 😶

I could hear a bit of disappointment in her voice before she moved on to something else. When the conversation was finished and the transaction went through, I still couldn’t shake the defensiveness I felt. The piece in question that she wanted to buy was my drawing “Quiet Agony”. It’s the drawing that I use in all my online profiles related to my art as well as the image on my business cards and any promotional material. But this drawing isn’t just a part of my branding, it’s my Avatar, a visual representation of me; something I drew that represents my inner being. It’s as personal as an actual photo of myself, even though it isn’t an actual drawing of me. (I don’t have a fro hawk.) This is one of those pieces I could never part with. On the back I even have it written “NOT FOR SALE, EVER!”. I create a lot of drawings and although I may share them online, they’re not always for sale. I understand that it doesn’t hurt to ask and I know that sometimes I take down pieces from my website that may have been sitting there too long, like for a year, to make room for new works, yet are still available to be purchased but not everything is for sale. Some pieces are just sacred to me and this is one of them. I even have it in a secure safe place that if there was a fire, it would be the one piece that would survive, that’s just how sacred it is to me. 🙏

Humble Beginnings

Peek inside my personal studio. (It’s just a drawing desk.)

Welcome to my humble little studio. This is where all the magic happens…okay, it really happens in the corner of the couch that’s out of view but this is where the magic gets finished. As you can see it’s just a drawing desk and a bunch of my drawing pens in old coconut oil jars and cups along with a couple of other knick knacks. There isn’t much too it but it’s my little sacred space where I’m able to get things done.

One day I will have a beautiful home studio with a big desk, lighting and camera equipment for capturing my own photo references, hopefully a personal model or two and books and sketches all over my walls. I’ve got studio goals. 😊

A lovely studio idea from my vision board on Pinterest.

The Universe Isn’t Punishing You…

…when things fall through. But often times that’s what I immediately feel. When I step back, way back, in order to get some clarity, I realize it’s no direct fault of my own but at first, it’s easy to start beating up on myself. As an artist these internal beatings have a lot to do with getting buyers for my work and doing commissions. I’ll go into a tizzy and start wondering what did I do wrong when things don’t work out? Maybe my work isn’t good enough. Maybe I didn’t speak the right words. Maybe I didn’t pray hard enough. Maybe I’m not thinking positively enough or vibrating at the right frequency enough. These thoughts get me all in a knot of anxiety and confusion that sometimes I end up spending way too much time search my personal library for the correct formula to get myself right with the universe than I do in crafting my art. The truth is, which I often have to remind myself of, there are things that will always be out of my hands. I only have control over my own thoughts and actions.

As an artist you are going to run into people who will commission you to do work and then change their minds. You are going to run into people who you will do freelance work for who won’t pay you. You are going to run into people who will get your hopes up and go through all the motions of acting like they are going to buy some of your work but won’t follow through. You may run into a lot of people like this or just a few but none the less you will run into them. This is just the way it is. It doesn’t matter how prayed up you are, how positively you think, how long you sit in mediation, how many candles you light or how many incantations you speak. You will encounter such individuals along the road to your success. Don’t let them trip you up and doubt your aspirations. Keep moving forward because no one is going to care about your dreams, your goals or your craft as much as you or take it as seriously as much as you. So don’t build the worth of your dream upon the words and actions of others. Keep believing in yourself and your vision. Devote yourself to it by all means. As you keep going more opportunities will come. You will meet more people who will actually buy your work, follow through with that commission or give you that amazing gig.  All of the let downs are just a part of the journey or as a former love once said to me “You gotta go through the shit to get to the sugar.”.
Your main focus and responsible is creating the best possible work that you can create according to your vision and putting it out there into the world as much as possible. The rest is out of your hands.